In a whirlwind romance that began over lunch at The New Statesman in 1991, Nicci Gerrard and Sean French quickly became a couple. Gerrard, a newly appointed deputy literary editor, was navigating life as a single mother when she met French, a columnist. Their connection was immediate and profound, leading to a marriage and a blended family within months.
The couple’s relationship developed rapidly, marked by significant life changes. “We met in March, I was pregnant by June and we married in October,” Gerrard recalls. Their family expanded quickly, with two more children arriving soon after, creating a lively household of four children under five.
Life as Partners and Parents
Gerrard and French’s partnership extended beyond their personal lives into their professional spheres. Gerrard became the primary breadwinner, while French embraced the role of a stay-at-home dad, a rarity at the time. “He was the rare dad at the school gates who wrote at home,” Gerrard notes, highlighting French’s unique approach to deadlines and work-life balance.
French’s penchant for procrastination often led to spontaneous baking sessions, much to Gerrard’s amusement. “He told me once he’d never, ever met a deadline; if he had one looming, he’d find something else to do like making bread,” she shares. This anecdote underscores the couple’s complementary personalities, with French’s introspective nature balancing Gerrard’s more outgoing demeanor.
Navigating Challenges and Celebrating Differences
Their relationship, like any, was not without its challenges. Gerrard acknowledges the gender divides in their household, particularly concerning emotional labor. “A lot of the emotional labour is done by me; I carry it around with me – you know, which of the children needs to be worried about?” she explains.
Despite these challenges, the couple’s mutual respect and admiration have been constants. “One of the lovely things about Sean is I never get to the end of him: he has a prodigious memory and everything connects,” Gerrard says. Their differences, from social preferences to approaches to change, have only strengthened their bond.
Facing Personal Loss and Finding Solace
In 2014, Gerrard faced a personal tragedy when her father, who had been living with dementia, deteriorated rapidly after a hospital stay. “It was like a wrecking ball that went through the family,” she remembers. During this difficult time, French provided unwavering support, serving as Gerrard’s “safe place.”
The couple found solace in shared experiences, including a transformative four-month stay in Lucca, Italy, after their children left for university. “It was such a carefree time and that’s when we began reading to each other,” Gerrard recalls. Their literary journey included all of Shakespeare’s plays and Dante’s works, with French showcasing his talent for accents.
Looking Forward: A Literary Legacy
As they continue to navigate life’s changes, Gerrard and French remain committed to their shared passions and enduring partnership. Their story is a testament to the power of love, resilience, and the written word. Their journey, marked by both challenges and triumphs, offers a poignant reminder of the beauty found in life’s complexities.
As they look to the future, Gerrard and French continue to inspire through their writing and their story, proving that the most profound connections often begin with a simple conversation over lunch.
