Fuelled by the relief of having finished end-of-year exams and the pleasure of a warm late spring evening, a house party in Cambridge turned tragic for Chris Moore. What should have been a night of celebration ended in a life-altering incident. Moore, then a student, and his friends decided to drive back from the party, despite having consumed significant amounts of alcohol. The decision led to a fatal accident that claimed the life of a cyclist.
Moore, who was asleep in the front passenger seat, awoke to find himself being extracted from the wreckage by paramedics. He was the only one injured among his friends, suffering deep lacerations on his forehead. The true horror of the night unfolded for him the next day in the hospital, where he learned of the cyclist’s death. The incident left him grappling with a complex mix of emotions, chief among them guilt.
The Complex Nature of Guilt
Today, Chris Moore is a professor of psychology and neuroscience at Dalhousie University in Nova Scotia. His journey from that fateful night to becoming an expert on guilt is both personal and professional. Moore has authored a book, The Power of Guilt, drawing from his own experiences and his extensive research in psychology. His work argues that guilt, while painful, serves a critical function in repairing relationships at both individual and societal levels.
Moore explains that guilt is not a standalone emotion but a blend of anxiety, compassion, sadness, and self-directed anger. When these emotions are balanced, guilt can motivate individuals to make amends and heal relationships. However, if self-directed anger dominates, it can lead to shame, which often results in withdrawal rather than reconciliation.
A Personal History with Guilt
Moore’s familiarity with guilt predates the accident. Raised in a Catholic family in Surrey, he was an “overscrupulous” child, often repeating prayers to ensure he was performing them correctly. This early experience with religious guilt laid the groundwork for his later understanding of the emotion’s complexity.
His academic journey took him to Cambridge, where he initially struggled but eventually found his footing in psychology. However, like many students, he was also drawn into a lifestyle of excessive drinking and poor decisions, culminating in the tragic accident.
Forgiveness and Redemption
Following the accident, Moore and his friends faced legal consequences, with Moore spending time in both a high-security facility and an open prison. Despite the severity of the situation, Moore’s parents offered him forgiveness, a gesture that was pivotal in his emotional recovery. Additionally, members of the Christian Union, including some who were directly affected by the accident, visited Moore in the hospital to extend their forgiveness.
“Their approach was that only God can judge, and that our duty as Christians is to forgive,” Moore recalls.
This forgiveness did not eliminate his guilt but alleviated its burden, allowing him to move forward. Moore emphasizes that this forgiveness was crucial in enabling him to live a fulfilling life and pursue a career focused on understanding and teaching about guilt.
The Role of Guilt in Society
Moore’s research delves into the societal implications of guilt. He suggests that guilt can be a powerful tool for fostering empathy and repairing relationships. For parents, inducing guilt in children can teach empathy and encourage them to make amends, provided it is done constructively.
He also addresses the concept of collective guilt, particularly in the context of historical injustices like slavery. Moore argues that acknowledging collective responsibility can open pathways for reparations and healing.
Looking Forward
Moore’s journey from a tragic accident to a career dedicated to understanding guilt underscores the emotion’s transformative potential. He advocates for a “relationship-first” approach, emphasizing the importance of maintaining strong connections, whether at the individual or societal level.
As Moore reflects on his life, he acknowledges that while he still feels some guilt about the accident, the forgiveness he received has allowed him to accept it and move forward. His story is a testament to the power of guilt to not only cause pain but also to heal and transform.
The Power of Guilt: Why We Feel It and Its Surprising Ability to Heal by Chris Moore will be published on January 8 by August Books.
